Captive
by CrazedArtist
Summary: So this is different. Jude has been abducted and Tommy is one of the abducters. There is a connection between them.
1. The Big One Six

**Chapter One- The Big One-Six**

I was taking a slow drink of my coffee. I gradually woke up and felt my head ache fade away. The amazing effect of coffee, I glanced over at mom who was experiencing the same thing as me. I smiled to myself and finished the last bit of my coffee. I put it in the dishwasher and kissed my mom on the cheek.

"Happy Birthday." She said smiling at me. "The big 16," She said looking proudly at me. "Are you sure you don't want to do anything special?" She asked me.

"Yeah I'm sure." I saw the look of disappointment in her eyes. "Mom, seriously I'll have other birthdays to celebrate." I pointed out.

"But you're only 16 once." She urged.

"Along with 17, 18, 20, 32, 44… want me to go on?" I asked her.

My mom laughed. "Okay, okay I get it." She said giving in.

I smiled at her. "So I'm probably going out with Jamie and Kat tonight, cool with you?" I asked her.

She smiled; I saw a hint of sadness in her eyes. I squeezed her hand for a moment. "Want to have a movie marathon like old times?" I asked her.

I saw the side of her mouth raise; she was trying to hold back a smile. "I don't want you to just do this for me; I want you to have fun." She said carefully.

"Come on." I said grinning. "I get to choose the movies, why wouldn't I want to do this?" I asked her.

She smiled, joyfully at me. "Okay, since you want to_ so_ much." She said teasingly.

I rolled my eyes and we went to the living room, while my mom was lounging on the coach, I went through the movie selection.

"So what are in the mood for?" My mom asked me.

"A little bit of romance, a little bit of drama." I said with a shrug.

"Notebook anyone?" My mom questioned.

"Mom, that is such a girl movie." I said looking over at her with dissatisfaction.

"Well honey if you haven't noticed you're a girl." My mom said.

"Like these would let me forget." I said gesturing to my breast.

"Hon you're a 36C, these are double D's." She said smugly.

"Lucky you." I said rolling my eyes. "How about…Breakfast Club?" I asked.

"Oh so romantic and dramatic." She said sarcastically.

"Hey it is dramatic." I said defensively. "Suicide, drug use, child abuse… it has everything."

"Yeah but all you see is the drug use and no one committed suicide just thought about it, and child abuse was just talked about." My mom said arguing my point.

"Yeah whatever but everyone hooked up except the nerd."

"Oh so romantic." My mom teased.

"Come on it's my birthday." I said pouting.

"I know, I know, let's watch it." She said putting her hands up in defeat.

After watching _Breakfast Club _and you guessed it _The Notebook_, my mom went out with her friends. "Oh honey." She said while opening the door to leave. "Look under your bed."

Before I could say anything my mom left. Kat, Jamie and I were going to go to a club for my birthday. Jamie's older brother is a bouncer so we have an in. I went upstairs figuring I could wear my black dress, I wonder if it still fits. I looked under my bed figuring my mom got me good smelling lotion and body wash. I was right along with a long black box. A red bow held it together and I untied it, figuring it was a shirt or something. I was wrong. It was a dress. It was the exact color of my eyes. She knew I was going out and she knew I was going to a club. Sneaky, sneaky lady, I grinned. Before I got a really clear look at it my cell phone started to ring.

It was Kat. "My mom knew?" I questioned.

Kat started laughed. "Yeah, we knew you needed a great dress. I helped her pick it out."

"I can't wait to put it on." I said excited.

"I'm coming over, go take a shower and then I'll do your hair and make up. Hon you're getting some tonight." She said suggestively.

"I'm counting the minutes." I said sarcastically.

"I'll be there in half and hour."

"See you then." I said and hung up.

I grabbed the sweet pea scented body wash and headed for the bathroom. After almost an hour of scrubbing and washing in the shower, I smelled like a flower. I walked out of the bathroom to see a very impatient Kat.

"A whole hour?" She asked me, taping her foot.

I smiled at her. "Remember I'm getting some today?" I questioned, teasing her.

She grinned. "So birthday girl, go blow dry your hair and I'll get your present." She said getting up to leave. I plugged in my hair dryer and sat on my bed and turned it on high. By the time my auburn hair was dry, Kat came up with a tower of presents. There was one large one, on top of it there was a medium and on top of that one there was a small one.

"The tower of Jude." She announced.

I smiled and threw my arms around her. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." I said enthusiastically.

Kat laughed. "Okay before you cut off all my oxygen supply," She said teasingly. "Open your present." She said a little more gently.

I smiled at her. The big one was a stereo. "Yes." I said pumping my arm in the air. "All around sound and everything."

"That's from Jamie; the other two are from me."

"Where is Jamie?" I asked her.

"He didn't want to be apart of all this girly-ness." She answered

"No surprise there." I said rolling my eyes. Jamie feels his identity as a man is sometime lost when he is with us. In simpler terms he hates it that all the guy's think he is gay. Kat thinks he is as strait as a rainbow and personally I think he has a thing for Kat. The medium box was butt load of various CD's. Ranging from _The Killers_ to _Queen_ to _David Bowie_. The last CD was a signed one. By _Muse_, my favorite band.

"This is amazing." I said attacking Kat with another hug. It wrote _To Jude: On her sixteenth birthday, Celebrate!!!_

"Yeah I thought you would like it." She said. That was defiantly the understatement of the year.

"Like it, I love it." I said studying the writing. It was the mixture of cursive and print.

"Open the next one." She urged me.

The last box was small. I opened it slowly revealing a pair of sapphire earrings.

"I know you're into the funky type of jewelry but they wouldn't go with that dress." She said gesturing to the box. "And there is a necklace also." She said noticing I hadn't seen it.

The necklace and matching earrings went perfect dress, they were simple but beautiful.

"Kat, thanks you are amazing." I said hugging her one last time.

"You are too." She said once the hug ended. "Come on hair and then makeup."

Within two hours of getting ready (don't forget, Kat has to look good too) we were done.

We were both standing in front of my mirror admiring each other.

Kat was wearing a spunky, cocktail dress that ended a good two inches above her knee. It was ruby red and contrasted nicely against her golden brown skin. Her usually curly hair was strait and hung loosely down her back, her light brown highlights even more vibrant against her dark brown hair. Her makeup was smoky making her look mysterious and to top it off her 3-inch heal, black stilettos, making her legs look endless.

I studied myself, it was a definite change from my torn up jeans and band shirts. My dress was a backless halter that went to my ankles. The dress hugged my bottom nicely causing countless fantasies for men. It made my eyes stand out more then usual and looked striking against my pearly white skin. My eyes were accented with a glimmering silver eye shadow outlined with black eyeliner. Soft pink blush shimmered against my cheeks and a rose lip gloss made my lips appear fuller. My hair was in delicate curls that softened my face, while hanging carelessly against my bare back. I was wearing silver, 4 inch heal stilettos. I was about 5'8" now. I put on my earrings and necklace adding the last touch.

"Jamie is going to be here soon." Kat said smiling at me. "You look bea-u-tiful." She said holding out each syllable.

"And you look hot." I said smiling. "_Picante_ anyone?" I asked laughing.

She laughed and we heard honking. "Jamie's here." She said excited. "Let's get our groove on."

We walked cautiously down stairs, not wanting to end this night fatally. We opened the door and were greeted by Jamie. He was wearing nice black pants and a green buttoned up shirt not tucked in, his hair a little messy having this total musician look to him.

"Wow." Was all he could say a first, his eyes on me for a moment but settling on Kat. "I'm defiantly going to be the most envied guy there."

"You sure will." Kat said playfully. "Now don't you have something to say to Jude?" She asked, nudging him.

Jamie smiled warmly at me and pulled me into an embrace. "Happy birthday." He said kindly.

I hugged him back. "Thanks for the stereo."

"You like it?" He asked eagerly.

"You know I do." I said smiling at him.

"It has a stronger bass part if you didn't notice." He began. "I know that's what you love to hear."

Jamie, my music lover. "I love you guys." I said giving them a hug.

We got in Jamie's car after reminiscing a little and headed for the club. We sang along to a few songs on my new CDs and we ended up at the club in just a matter of minutes. Jamie opened the door for both me and Kat, being a complete gentleman, even though I secretly know he was trying to impress the long line of people.

We walked up to the bouncer at the front of the line and he smiled when he saw Jamie. "Hey little brother." He said affectionately, ruffling up his hair.

"And Jude," He began, his eyes on me. "You are no longer four feet tall and I hope not as much of a pain in the ass as you use to be." Luke was his name. He baby sat me when I was eight. He liked to call me devil child. I earned that name. "Happy Birthday." He said giving me a big bear hug. He was huge compared to Jamie. 6'8" and square. "You look gorgeous."

I smiled at him. "You don't look to bad either." I said giving him a flirty look. It was a game, believe me, Luke was like a brother to me.

He laughed. "Jude, you are the closest thing I have to a baby sister." He said reading my mind. "Incest is not my thing." Then a little spark appeared in his eyes. "But I could change that tonight." He said seductively, putting me in a fit of giggles.

"Keep it in your pants Luke." I heard Kat said.

He laughed. "Believe me it's in there." He said pulling Kat into a hug. "So Kat when are you and my brother going to call it quits and get hitched?" He asked her, he obviously saw what I saw. "You should join the family."

"I am the family." Kat said with a laugh, avoiding the questioned.

"Yeah whatever." He said not completely satisfied. "Get in and remember, Jude it's not you're sixteenth birthday."

I laughed. "Yeah I'm eighteen." I said playing the part.

"That's the spirit." He said and ushered us in. I heard a few people calling out in frustration.

"Wow." I said to Kat as we walked around to find a table. There were strobe lights everywhere, making everything move in slow motion. Girl on girl, guy on girl, guy on guy, it was very sexually diverse. We finally found a table and Jamie went off to get us drinks. Non-alcoholic, I know we are in a club but yeah… I'd rather die of old age then drunk driving, anyway that isn't exactly the most original way for a teenager to die.

"Don't look but someone is totally staring at you." Kat whispered in my ear.

Of course I looked and my eyes met these icy blue eyes. He was handsome. Dark brown, clean cut hair and a nice face; he had high cheekbones that made him look rather stunning. His jaw was set making him look somewhat unapproachable so I looked away hastily and raised my eyebrow at Kat.

"Yeah…" She said noticing the dark look in his eyes. "So he's probably a bad boy."

"Yeah or criminal."

"You would say that." Kat said smiling at me.

Jamie came up to us with three drinks, almost completely spilling it on criminal boy, whose dark eyes got even darker. "Anger problem, huh?" Jamie said worriedly handing me my coke and Kat her mountain dew.

"Jude decided he is a criminal." Kat announced.

"For murder." Jamie added.

"On a nun and pregnant woman." I completed.

We all laughed and a slow song came on causing Jamie to stop abruptly. His eyes were on Kat who was still laughing. I looked at him and tilted my head at her, giving him permission.

He smiled at me and he cleared his throat. "Um..Kat?" He questioned.

Kat stopped laughing seeing the serious look on his face. "Yeah?"

"Would you like to dance?" He asked her.

She looked stunned. Actually stunned. She looked over at me and I pushed her shoulder softly. "Go on."

"Yeah, I would like that." She said taking hold of Jamie's hand as he led her to the dance floor.

I watched them dance, they were cute. She was a good six inches shorter then him so she had to look up at him when he spoke. She was smiling at him the way he always smiled at her.

"Would you like to dance?" I looked up and was met with chocolate brown eyes. I was too startled to say anything. "Um.." He began, looking somewhat defeated.

"Yes." I said before he could say anything. "Sorry, I was just spacing out."

"Oh that's good, I was like damn, am I going to have to ask again?" He said with a good-natured laugh.

He led me to the dance floor and I finally got a good look at him. He must be at least eight inches taller then me (and remember I'm in four inch heals) because his head rested comfortably on mine. He had longish black hair and a lean athletic body.

"I'm David." He said after a moment of silence.

"I'm Jude." I said looking properly at him.

"Hi Jude." He said, his voice full of warmth.

I was about to say something but I was cut off.

"Mind if I cut in." I turned my head and there was criminal boy. His voice was deep and a lot quieter then I expected. He didn't look at me, just at David.

I saw David look at him with a mixture of confusion and I think anger. He was about to say something but criminal boy cut him off. "Please."

David looked at me. "It was a pleasure to meet you." I heard a slight edge to his voice. "We should dance again."  
Part of me wanted to say I wish we could finish this dance but with criminal boy standing there, I felt that might be a little rude. "We should." I said looking over at criminal boy who was still refusing to look at me.

David sulked off, looking pissed. I didn't want to dance with criminal boy to be honest. I don't think he realized that because he took hold of my hand and gently put them around my neck. He was probably six foot because I still had to look up at him but we were more leveled with each other. I was forced to make eye contact with him. His eyes were so dark that it was hard to read them and that frightened me. I looked away and saw David watching us. He was sitting with a group of guys whose eyes were on me. Creepy, where is Jamie and Kat? I turned my head and met his eyes reluctantly again.

"So I'm Tom." He said awkwardly.

I didn't say anything, god why am I dancing with _him_? I expected him to ask me what my name was but he didn't. I pulled away from him, this just felt weird.

"I have to go." I muttered, not bothering with an excuse. I made my way to the bathroom and looked at myself. This is my birthday, I'm wearing a beautiful dress, I was with my two best friends, I danced with two hot guys, I should be having the time of my life but things didn't feel right. I couldn't explain it but I felt uneasy. I walked out of the bathroom not exactly paying attention. I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head. Then everything went black.


	2. World of Shadowy and Unsettling Question

**Chapter Two- World of Shadowy and Unsettling Questions**

My head was throbbing and I was too weak to open my eyes. I heard voices. Unfamiliar voices, all male and all nearby. There was a splitting pain in my ankles and I unwillingly opened my eyes to see what it was. Mascara was stinging my eyes taking me a moment to adjust. The pain in my ankles became insignificant when everything around me became more apparent. I was in a small, dimly lit room that smelled of piling up filth and an unsettling smell of blood. I realized that my hands and legs were tied up and reality hit me. I've been abducted. I felt terror dawn on me as I meaninglessly tried to untie the rope around my ankles, only making it tighter, causing an agonizing pain that sliced my ankles. My feet were becoming stained red, as I muffled the cries of pain that was bottled up in my throat. I realized I was laying on a cut up couch with one pillow that had the strong odor of sour sweat. I tried to get up, wanting to become familiar with my surroundings but failed miserably and landed on a small table slicing my arm, forcing me to cry out in pain. I heard the voices stop and I realized it was coming from above me. I tried focusing but the pain was making everything unclear.

"What the hell was that?" I heard someone demand. I heard a door being unlocked and a door swing open. A gush of air hit me like a slap in the face and until then I didn't realize how stifling it was in here. I watched as four figures came down the stairs and I became conscious to the fact that I was in a basement.

"Where are the damn lights?" I heard someone ask. I knew that voice. Before I could think about it a blinding light caused two abrupt pains in my head, blinding me for a moment.

"Jesus." I heard one of them said.

"Go on." Said the familiar voice. "Go help her, I don't want blood everywhere."

I finally adjusted and my vision became clear. Four men with burglar mask over their faces were in front of me. They were all tall and muscular. Two of them violently helped me up causing me to cry out in anguish.

"Be careful." One of the ones in front of me said. He sounded familiar too. What's going on? "We're not here to hurt her."

"We will if we have too." One of the guys said that was holding me up.

"Yeah but she hasn't even said a word." He argued.

"Go bandage her up Eagle." The other familiar voice said. They were using nicknames.

"Yes Chief." The Eagle said coming towards me. I felt his hands on my ankles as he untied the rope that imprisoned them. I felt a gush of blood come ooze out of my ankle causing an undeniable burn that made me fall back for a moment. Someone behind me helped me stay up while my whole body started to shake violently.

"See this is what happens when you try to get away." One of them said spitefully.

I didn't say anything, this was a reminder.

The Chief stepped forward and started talking to whoever spoke to me. "You know what your job is and that's not. Get back to work both of you." I watched as the two men walked away, angry because they were put in their place.

The Chief looked over at me, his eyes were visible but I looked away immediately. "Jude," He began. I looked at him startled. "Yes I know your name." He said reading my mind. "I know a lot about you and we'll just leave it at that." He said. "We are not here to hurt you, that's not part of the plan." He said talking to me like I was a business partner. "Those guys might not be as considerate so don't try to get on their good side because they don't have one." He was silent. "I'm a good guy sometimes but you won't see that often, I'm here for business purpose solely and you work for me, got it?" He questioned.

I nodded weakly.

"You're in a lot of pain right now, I can see it, I can _smell_ it." The smell of my blood was becoming intoxicating. "That's your fault. Those ropes were made specially for this situation. There is a certain way you have to untie them because pulling them makes them tighter, as you can tell." He said gesturing to the blood that dried on my feet. "And your arm was cut, I'm guessing by the table." He said noticing the blood stain on the end of the table. "All because you were in a desperate attempt to escape, believe me it will only get worse if you continue." He said lecturing me. "Listen my job isn't to hurt you but I will if I have to. So don't put me in that position." He looked at me. "If you end up dying or coming out of this with more then the cuts you have now, it will be all your fault." He paused. "So really your death won't bother me because I know that I gave you fair warning of the consequences. I won't kill you for no apparent reason because that is a waste of a bullet and a life but I will if the occasion arises." He was silent for a moment. "All you have to do is stay here and be quiet, just cooperate Miss Harrison and you'll come out of this with only the cuts you have now."

He turned to the Eagle. "Just clean her up and give her some new clothes. I don't want the guys to get any ideas."

I realized I was still wearing my dress, which was now ruined with all my blood. The Chief turned and walked away. I watched as he took the last step of the stairs and closed the door behind him. I looked at the Eagle who was now untying my wrist. They were a little red and I rubbed them trying to smother the stinging.

"So there is a shower in that room." He said gesturing to a door I hadn't noticed before. "Just clean off all the blood and I'll bandage you up."

I walked slowly over to the door, the pain in my ankles was excruciating. I opened the door and a wave of repulsion came over me. The smell was sickening, a mix of vomit, blood and urine all in one. I closed the door and slowly took off my dress, careful to not let it touch my cuts. I studied the room and there was no escape, it was completely closed off and there was not one visible window. There was a mirror and I realized how awful I looked. My makeup was smeared all over my face and my hair was just a mess giving me this pathetic look. I turned on the shower and there was only two temperatures it gave me. Cold and cold, though it felt good after I adjusted. The burning on my ankles went to a dull sting and I felt myself relax. I used some questionable soap and washed my hair and body with it. I got out of the shower and looked at myself. I looked clean and innocent. I wanted that, like the Chief said _I don't want the guys to get any ideas_. I looked around and noticed there weren't any towels. You have to be kidding me.

I heard a knock on the door.

I didn't say anything; I felt that keeping my mouth shut was the right thing to do.

"I have a towel and some clothes." The voice said.

I opened the door just enough and grabbed it from him and shut the door. I dried myself off and slipped on an over sized shirt and shorts. The shirt covered the shorts and ended about in the middle of my thigh. I felt exposed but I was comfortable. I opened the door and looked at the Eagle.

"Come on I have to bandage you up." He said in a hurry. He led me to the couch and I sat down. He had some disinfection stuff and he put it on my ankles, bringing tears to my eyes for a moment. He bandaged them up and I couldn't help but notice how gentle he was, different from the others who didn't care if I cried out in pain. Once he was done with my ankles he went to my arm and put the disinfection stuff on it and it burned awfully. I fell back surprised by the pain but the Eagle caught me. His arm was around my waist keeping me steady, while he put pressure above my cut to ease the pain. The pain soon went away and removed his arm from around my waist and bandaged my cut.

"I'm not going to tie you up again." He said looking at me. "What happened before was a warning, just don't act up and you'll be fine." He said getting up.

"Why am I here?" I asked him.

He halted, startled that I actually spoke. He recovered from his shock and continued to walk away, ignoring my question. I sighed and lay down on the couch. I looked around me. I was in a world of shadowy and unsettling questions.


	3. Exposed

**Chapter Three- Exposed**

I felt myself finally drift off to sleep. The door to the bathroom was becoming a mere blur and my whole body was going into immediate relaxation. My eyelids became heavy and all the thoughts in my head were pacified. The voices had stopped awhile ago, making it easier to ignore what is going on and make my heart cease to a normal beat. I was just a few moments away from falling into a deep sleep but the click of the door being unlocked startled me. I lay still on the couch, my hearing stronger then ever. The door was open quietly and it shut soundlessly. I heard each footstep taking down the stair and the fifth step creaked. I shut my eyes, hoping whoever was there would see that I was asleep and would leave me be. Whoever was there ran into the table, breaking the glass, causing me to cringe.

"I have dinner." It was the Eagle.

I didn't respond, I continued to pretend I was asleep.

"I know you're awake." The Eagle said gruffly. "I saw you flinch."

I unwillingly opened my eyes and looked at the broken table and then at the Eagle, who was bleeding just above his knee. I got up and headed for the bathroom.

"Where are you going?" He demanded.

I didn't answer. I opened the bathroom door and noticed the disinfection stuff and bandages. I grabbed both of them and headed towards the Eagle. He was watching me and stepped back when I came up to him. I ignored him and went on my knees to be leveled with his leg. I carefully put the disinfection stuff on his knee. Half of me expected him to pull away and say some obscene thing but he stayed perfectly still. I took out the bandage and delicately put it around his knee. I didn't look at him for approval; I did this because he did the same for me.

I saw some, what I'm assuming, soup spilled on the floor. There was some left so I grabbed the spoon that some how ended on the opposite side of the room, and sat uncomfortably on the couch and took a bite. It was…disgusting. I wasn't hungry at the moment so I placed it softly on the half broken table and glanced up to see the Eagle standing there. I looked away and fretfully played with the end of my shirt.

"Hungry?" He asked me.

I shook my head, refusing to look his way.

He took hold of the bowl and was about to leave but stopped. "You won't be getting food for a while," He began. "This may be disgusting now but in a few hours you will wish you ate it."

I didn't respond. I wasn't going to give in. For all I know they could of drugged it.

I heard him sigh in frustration and he left. He locked the door behind him and I felt myself sadden. I felt tears enter my eyes and I briskly brushed away the tear that got away. I took in a deep breath and gradually calmed myself done. Being so isolated and detached caused hollowness within me. The only thing I felt was the pain developing just above my neck. I put a little pressure on it, only making it worse.

"This sucks." Yes I know…understatement of the year.

The voices above me began again and I knew the necessity to sleep was going to be delayed temporally. I struggled to listen but the fatigue was prevailing. All the words said were mumbled together creating a new language. I felt myself surrender to sleep and I began closing my eyes. I faintly heard a door be unlocked but when the door was slammed open, I was entirely awake. I saw two men come down the stairs, neither of them the Eagle or the Chief. Their emotions were a mix of infuriation and intoxication. I rose up from the couch and backed up only to be greeted by the half shattered table. I tripped over it and before I knew it I was on the ground….with one of the men on top of me.

"You think you're so special?" He demanded, his breath a disgusting mix of vodka and cigarettes.

I didn't answer. Part of me afraid what would happen if I did and the other part of me afraid of what would happen if I didn't.

"Answer me bitch." He said a look of hatred lurking in his eyes.

I didn't.

"So I guess she can't talk." The other one said sardonically. "Maybe she can't talk but maybe she can scream."

At first I thought violence but when I saw the look in the guy's eyes on top of me, I knew better.

"I was thinking moan." He said, they both laughed while I felt a coldness wash over me.

The man on top of me started raising my shirt and felt his hands explore my thigh. I thought of fighting back, but there's no use. I am going to die here; I have no doubts, so why die a virgin? I felt his hands on my shorts and he pulled them done and tossed it over to the guy watching.

He smiled at me, causing a mixture of disgust and fears enter me. "It hurts the first time," He began, looking at me. "I'll make sure of that."

"What the hell is this?" Someone demanded. It was the Chief.

"Get the fuck off of her." Someone ordered. It was the Eagle.

"Ah come on." The man on top of me complained. "I haven't gotten any for awhile."

"Then I suggest you and you're buddy," The Eagle said nodding at the other man. "Become acquainted because he seems as desperate as you."

"Fuck off." The man on top of me said, shrugging him off. His hand went under my shirt again and they started to tug on the sides of my thong (remember tight dress is to thong as peanut butter is to jelly). I could tell he was surprise.

"Dirty girl." He said, his voice dripping with sleaze.

"Get your ass over here." The Chief demanded.

"Believe me fellas, it's my other part you should be concerned about." He said and before I knew it, he was dragged off me and hurled against the wall. I saw that it was the Eagle.

"Both of you." The Chief said pointing at them. "You're asses upstairs," He looked over at me for barely a second. "Now." He ordered.

The one that had become familiar with the wall left without any hesitation. The other one stood his ground.

The Chief looked at him. "Did you see your friend, how fucked up he is now?" He asked.

The man didn't respond.

"Let's just say if you don't get you're ugly ass up there, you won't be as lucky." He said menacingly.

The man didn't say anything at first but then grudgingly left. The Chief looked at me and I could tell he was sorry. I was surprised to say the least.

"This is probably the only time you will ever hear me say this," He began. "This wasn't your fault. Those two shitheads were drunk and horny and you have breast, simple as that." I looked at him confused. "Let's just say you didn't deserve any of this. But if something like this happens again, I might not be as generous." He walked away leaving me alone with the Eagle.

The Eagle was watching me as I weakly grabbed my shorts from of the ground and went to put them on. He turned away giving me as much privacy as he could and I quickly slipped them back on.

"You okay?" He asked me.

I didn't look at him but for once I answered him. "Yeah."

He didn't say anything else but look at me.

I heard the guys up stairs.

"You guys are idiots." It was the Chief.

"You're the idiot." One of them yelled back. "You're letting Tom be in charge of her." I didn't hear anything else because my eyes flew up meeting the Eagle's. Icy blue eyes. I'm a fucking idiot, everything became clear but more questions arose.

"Tom?" I questioned.

There was only one thing he could say. "Shit."

A/N: I'm sorry guys that it took so long, computer problems and all. For the other readers who read my other story, expect a post tomorrow. Thanks you guys.


	4. Complicated

A/N: So this one is a little different from the others. It's in Tom's point of view.

**Chapter Four- Complicated**

God dammit those fucking guys, I thought bitterly to myself. I watched as she became aware to how big this was.

"Tom." She questioned, her eyes widening.

There was only one thing I could say. "Shit."

"You're Tom." She said and then she started to laugh hysterically.

She's crazy, I knew it. "Listen calm down." I said trying to muffle her laughs. "If the guys find out you know who I am, they'll kill you."

Her laughs stopped abruptly and she began to compose herself. "I don't get it." She said looking at me

"It's…complicated." I said and left it at that.

**Flashback: Club Night**

I know she was mad when I cut in on the dance. I didn't want to, it was business, strictly business. I was just as reluctant as her to have her arms around my neck. I knew her type, the minute the Chief pointed her out to me. Beautiful, yes that was a given. Everything about her made you stop and admire, I have seen some striking women believe me but she was different. Beautiful eyes, the most amazing shade of blue against her flawless skin. Then her beautiful red hair that shimmered along with her seductive dress. Yes she was easy on the eyes but that was about it. She was that typical, selfish, teenage girl, I saw it. Getting into a bar that was for 21 years and older, making eye contact with any one who bothered to look at her, not a care in the world, and showing off everything she's worth. She was nothing new, nothing exciting. I decided I might as well be a decent guy. Seriously who gives a shit?

"I'm Tom." It was awkward. She didn't like me the minute she saw me. I remembered the way she looked at me when one of friends pointed me out. Like I was trash and believe I thought the same of her. Then her stupid friend who almost spilled all that soda on me, I hate fucking teenagers.

She didn't say anything back. Bitch. Her name was Jude Harrison, birthday today. The Chief knew everything about her but none of this has to do with her, she is just merely a tool in our whole plan.

She pulled away and mumbled something ridiculous. I couldn't believe it when she walked away. Believe me I wasn't yearning to be able to touch her or hold her but like I said before…bitch.

I walked over to the chief and his two morons, who I noticed earlier, were watching Jude and I.

"Hi." I said curtly. I was pissed to say the least.

"I guess your charm wasn't overpowering." The Chief snickered.

I looked at him. "She's a bitch."

"She seems sweet to me." One of the morons said.

I was about to say something but the Chief cut me off. "You two go wait outside the ladies room I believe that's where she went. Knock her out and take her out back through the back doors," He paused and looked at me for a moment. "You know where the truck is."

The two morons got up and headed towards the restrooms, leaving me and the Chief alone.

"She's a beauty." The Chief said, taking the last drink of his beer.

"Yeah," I agreed. "We should worry about the morons around her."

"They have name." The Chief said leaning back in his booth.

"So do you but you don't see me saying it." I pointed out.

He smiled at me. "So what should I call you Tom, the Eagle?" He questioned with a laugh.

"How original." I said sarcastically.

"The crime we are committing isn't exactly original so why start now?" He asked me, grinning.

I laughed. He has a point. I looked over to see her friends. They were looking for her, it was obvious. The girl was making a point to go to the restrooms and the guy was taking out his cell phone. I looked over at the Chief, who had noticed the same thing.

"You take the guy, I'll handle the girl." I nodded and we both got up. I made my way to the guy who was punching in numbers.

"Hi, can I talk to you for a moment?" I asked him.

The guy looked up and almost dropped his phone. "I um.." He began, I could tell he thought I was mad about the soda incident. Believe me I was over it. He closed his phone causing me to relax.

"Listen, you look like a musician." I said studying him.

"Um…" He said intelligently, haha.

"Are you in a band or…" I said trailing off, I looked over at the Chief who was obviously flirting with the girl, believe me it was going both ways.

I saw the guy staring at them. "Um… no." He said glancing at me.

"Any music experience?" I asked him. "Because I think you would be perfect for my band."

He finally looked at me. "Seriously?" He questioned.

"Yeah you defiantly have the look," I almost laughed despite myself. "And I saw you dancing and you defiantly have rhythm." You know just the kind that doesn't exist.

"Really do you think so?" He asked excitedly.

"Yeah, definite potential." I said forcing a smile.

"Wow, I mean I knew I had talent when it came to music." He began pompously.

Oh jeez seriously man, you're not that special.

"But no one has ever pointed that out." He said smiling. "Except you." Then it was weird he looked at me and believe it was like those movies when guy see's girl and wedding bells ring.

Excuse me while I throw up in my mouth and die.

"Yeah well I have an eye for talent." I said thinking about the talent I usually acquired. You know the type you can find on the corner of 69th street.

"Wow, are you a producer?" He asked me.

Ha ha now that's funny, like I'd ever be a producer. "I guess you could say that."

"Really? Wow here's my number." He grabbed my hand, yes I mean grabbed it and wrote his number. _Jamie 291-3023_. Some guys walked past us and was like _wait why are we at a gay club? _And the idiot by him answered_ lesbians. _Jamie didn't notice. He was too busy outlining the numbers making them become emended in my hand.

"Wow can I have your number; I really want to give you a call."

Wait, really? Is this guy queer? Really I have nothing against it but yeah I'm as strait as it gets.

"No I'll call you."

"Oh I thought we could maybe hangout." He said lightly.

Yeah about that… "What about that one chick? Aren't you two an item?" I asked him. Yes I said item, I'm embarrassed too. I should have been like are you doing her but sometimes I forget to be that typical asshole of a guy.

"Yeah." He answered.

Cue long awkward silence.

"Oh." I said finally. Yeah so now we stooped down to one word conversations. Believe me I'm on the edge of the seat as much as you.

"Yeah."

There he goes again.

"Oh." Ha no I'm kidding I didn't say that. I sort of just walked away. The morons had come back and they were attempting to do some weird hand signal, and in turn completely violating some chick. Ah classic.

After the chick had basically castrated one of the morons, we were all in a group together.

Castrated moron was in pain and speaking in some language I couldn't detect. I thought he was just white. Not Asian, Hispanic or anything else. Maybe morons have their own language. I wouldn't be surprised. Women have their own language.

The other moron was laughing his ass off. If I was him I'd be thanking God that she didn't do the same to me. But yeah I'd be pretty slap-happy also if I just escaped a near de-man-if-y-ing experience. Yes I mean de-man-if-y-ing.

The Chief was trying not to smile but failed, miserably actually.

So yeah I'm standing here just thinking, yeah so we basically are kidnapping some chick and here we are laughing. I don't know, the world just seems to be falling apart.

"Um…" I said, dammit that Jamie kid is rubbing off on me.

"Yeah we should be going." The Chief said composing himself, within a matter of second.

The morons were still either crying or laughing. "Stop being a bunch of faggots." I said feeling pissed.

They gave me the look of death and I gave them the All-American hand gesture.

"Guys get your asses out there." The Chief said pointing at the back entry. "We don't want to cause a scene."

"With a dick like mine I couldn't help but cause a scene." The non-castrated moron said.

God what a fucking idiot.

"You mean the non-existent one?" The Chief asked him.

The Chief, my hero.

"Everyone we're leaving now." He demanded.

We all walked across the club, turning a few heads. We must have been quite a sight. The Chief and I in front, you know working our stuff. Then our two "body guards". One is basically sobbing holding his "possessions" and the other one is basically touching anything that walks. I wonder if he knew that one person who he fondled (haha funny funny word) was a man. Yeah he probably wouldn't even notice after they slept together, like I said… moron.

I was sitting in the front with the Chief, while the morons sat behind us, and behind them was sleeping beauty with a quite a bump on the back of her head.

"You know I said to knock her out, not to permanently give her brain damage." The Chief said after he observed the extremely visible bump.

"I didn't hit her that hard." One of the morons said.

The Chief ignored him, while he started the truck. "You know she seemed to like me." He said hauntingly.

"Who that one friend chick?" I asked him, looking in the rearview mirror, barely being able to see Jude. She was extremely good-looking I have to say that. Her mouth was scarcely open giving her this overpoweringly seductive look.

"No Jude." He said smiling. "Although, Kat," He began. "That's her name." He explained. "Wanted me."

"She was with the one kid who I had to talk to." I said looking out the window. The tree's looking especially haunting tonight.

"You mean Jamie?" He asked me.

"Yeah, how'd you know?" I asked him.

He gestured to my hand. _Jamie 291-3023_.

"So I guess he wanted you also." He said with a laugh.

Funny, funny guy. "He was an idiot."

"You think everyone's an idiot." The Chief said.

"Because everyone is." I said with a shrug.

The Chief rolled his eyes. "You remember the way Jude looked at you when you cut in on our dance." He said with laugh. "It was classic."

"Whatever." Now I was pissed.

"Don't be pissed, I just have a way with the ladies and you…" He began looking at my hand. "Have a way with the gentlemen."

"Fuck you." I said turning my back on him. Yes I was pouting.

"God get over your self Tom, I was just kidding around." The Chief said annoyed. "I saw the way you looked at her when she walked in. You weren't exactly Mr. Nice-guy so what'd you expect?" He asked. "Anyone way she's a sixteen year old fucking girl. Why do you give such a shit?" He asked me.

"I don't, I just hate that we are going to have to deal with such a bitch until we get what we want." I said looking over at him.

"She'll be fine." The Chief said. "She's smart, she'll know not to push us." He said with a shrug.

"What makes you so sure?" I asked him.

"Remember those ropes we used on you when you were acting like an idiot three years ago?" He asked me.

I winced. "Yeah."

"Well let's just say, you and Jude can converse about it and in detail."

"That's harsh." I observed.

"Well it will keep her in line and why do you care, remember she's a bitch." He said looking over at me.

"She is but no one deserves that kind of pain." I said looking over at him.

"You sure did." He said bluntly.

I didn't say anything. He was right.

We were here. It was a pretty good size cabin out in the middle of the woods. We all got out and the morons lifted Jude out of the truck severely hitting her head against the door.

The Chief completely blew up. "You fucking morons can't do anything right, we need this girl alive and you are fucking killing her."

"Hand her to me." I demanded and they listened. She was light in my hands. I carried her into the cabin and down to the basement. I placed her softly on the couch and the Chief came down after me. He took out the rope and tied her arms and ankles tightly.

I unconsciously pushed a strand of her hair out of her face. A small gesture but one that the Chief saw.

"Don't get attached Tom." He said softly.

"David," I began, forgetting he was the Chief but remembering he was my best friend. "She's a bitch, why would I bother?" I asked him, even though apart of me wondered.

"I know I'm just worried when you find out she isn't what you expected." He said and walked away leaving me alone…with her.

**End of Flashback**

"Complicated?" She demanded. "That's all you can say?"

"Yeah." I answered, like I said, it's complicated.


	5. End This

**Chapter Five- End This**

"Yeah?" I questioned, between gritted teeth.

He looked at me for a moment but he hastily looked away.

"You're pathetic." I spat at him.

He looked at me, dead in the eye, nothing but anger lurking in his face. "Don't you dare judge me."

"You know what? You're my kidnapper I have every right to judge you." I said taking a step towards him. "Look at me." He looked away. "See?" I almost yelled. "You're not even man enough to look me in the eye. You know you're scum." I said glaring at him.

"And what about you?" He demanded. "I knew I was right about you the minute I saw you."

"Really?" I said, feeling the anger in me become overpowering.

"Yeah." He answered. "Little teenage bitch who gets everything she wants." He said taking a step towards me. "You hated me the minute you saw me, like I was the scum of the earth."

"And you know what I was right." I said looking him dead in his eyes.

He took a step back, defeated. "Listen," He began. "If the guys know you know who I am they'll…"

"They'll what kill me?" I demanded. "I know you said that but they need me. I don't know why but they do. But they can find another one of you. You don't matter, I do."

He looked at me, the anger getting the best of him. He pushed me hard against the wall and I was pinned.

"Listen to me." He said, his voice tense and hoarse. "Those people," He said pointing upstairs. "They are nothing compared to the people we work for. The Chief, the two morons, me, we are nothing compared to people we work for." He said pain entering his eyes. "The people I work for, don't care if you live or not, that matters to us," He was silent for a moment. "That matters to me but if the Chief finds out you know who I am you're dead, not me. You don't understand Jude, those people will find someone who will take you're place before we are able to dump you're body in the closest river, got it?"

I felt tears enter my eyes and I looked away.

"Jude," He began. "I am indebted to those guys until the day I die. They have a use for me but they won't for you if they find out that you know who I am."

"Who else is there?" I demanded. "Why me?"

"Jude the more you know, the more likely you're not going to make this out alive." He said loosening his grip on me and stepping back, giving me some room.

"If those guys don't care if I live then why will I come out of this alive?" I asked him.

"Jude." Tommy began.

"No don't you Jude me. Don't you dare condescended me." I said feeling tears come down my face. "If I'm so easy to replace then just kill me." I said throwing my arms up in the air. "Just do it."

"Jude," He began.

"Finish what you started." I almost screamed.

"Jude, I didn't start this." Tom said in frustration.

"No?" I questioned. "Aren't you the one who danced with me, the one who kidnapped me?"

Tom came towards me and punched the wall. "What do you want from me?" He demanded.

"God I don't know, answers." I said pushing him, causing him to fall back in surprise.

"I can't give you that." He said looking at me.

I looked at him. "Then just leave."

He ignored me. "Jude you can't let them know that you know." He said desperately trying to make me understand.

"Why do you care?" I said tensely.

I saw his jaw set in a threatening way. "I don't." He said and turned around and left.

I sat down on the couch and broke down. Everything that I bottled up was coming out of me. Anger, fear, disappointment, and agony. I finally calmed myself done and I felt nothing but exhaustion. I felt my head tingle and it went slowly went down my body until I fell into a deep sleep.

_I walked in on my mom crying._

"_Mommy?" I questioned. _

_She looked at me and tried to compose herself but just broke down again. I looked around and saw that all the family pictures were scattered all across her room._

"_Mommy?" I pleaded this time. I walked cautiously over to her and saw the picture she was holding._

"_Jude," She began. "He's gone," She held on to me. "Honey his gone."_

I woke up, my breaths were quick and sharp. My head was aching like it always did when I thought of that day. I touched my face it was wet, I had been crying. I looked up startled to see Tom.

"I brought you breakfast." He said not meeting my eyes.

It was cereal. I looked at him and he put it quietly on the table. He handed me a spoon but I didn't take it.

"Jude," He began looking frustrated. "Eat."

I looked at him. "End this Tom."

"Not this again." He muttered under his breath.

I heard him. "Yes this again." I said standing up, facing him. "Just finish this, you've done it before why not do it again?"

"What makes you think I've killed someone before?" He demanded.

"What is it beneath you?" I asked, laughing. "God you're a fucking kidnapper."

He didn't say anything. "I'm not a murderer."

"But you'll just watch it?" I asked him. "You're just as bad as the guy holding the gun."

"What about you Jude?" He demanded.

"What about me?" I said glaring at him.

"You just go around partying and ignoring everything that's going on. What makes you so much better?" He challenged. "Jude this isn't a game, okay? This is a lifestyle."

"Some lifestyle." I scoffed. "At least I'm not making it easier for it to happen." I said taking a step towards him. "You're a monster, how can you let stuff like _this_ happen?" I asked him.

"Like this?" He questioned. "Jude you're in fucking paradise. _This_ is nothing compared to what I've seen."

"And you just let it happen." I said proving my point. "You let these people torture and murder other people and you watch." I looked at him, disgusted. "You're filth."

Tom didn't say anything right away. "You're right. And I deserve to burn in hell." He said looking at me. "But what I'm I suppose to do?" He asked me. "These people won't kill me, God some day's I wished they would." He sat down on the couch and rubbed the back of his neck. "These people will go after anything, anyone that may matter to me." He said trying to explain. "I can't escape, I can't do the right thing, it's impossible. Because either way someone is dying because of me." He looked at me. "God I'm already burning in hell."

Part of me knew I should understand but I couldn't. "If you want to do the right thing, then end this, end me."

"Jude," He began desperately.

"Tom, just take the extra step." I felt tears blur my vision. "Please." I begged. "Those guys were going to rape me and they will eventually. You can't save me and the Chief won't."

"I don't want to feel certain things that I know I'll feel if you let me live." I said my voice, filled with pain. "Tom I can't deal with knowing things are going to get worse." I was silent for a moment. "If these people are as bad as you say then why will I come out of this alive? They are going to torture me in the end, that's obvious. Please Tom, I'm going to die eventually, you'll be doing the right thing by ending this now."

He looked at me and stepped forward. He put his hands on my shoulder and looked at me. "I can't Jude."

"Why?" I asked him feeling so weak and powerless.

"Because I'm getting you out of here."


	6. Take A Chance

**Chapter Six- Take a Chance**

I looked at him and then started laughing. "You're an idiot." I finally said after I brought myself together.

He looked at me, surprised. "I'm an idiot?" He questioned. "Because I want to help you?" He had a funny edge to his voice.

"No because you think you can help me." I said looking at him. "This is ridiculous."

He glared at me. "I don't even know why I try." He said bitterly and went upstairs. He stopped at the door and turned to look at me. "I was totally right about you." And then he slammed the door.

I know I was a bitch. But seriously he can't save me, no one can, it's pretty obvious. He just wants to do this so that he thinks he has a place in heaven or something. I sat down on the couch and sighed. It was weird, it was the first time I felt at ease in a long time. Then that changed when I heard the voices upstairs.

"You're not getting attached are you?" Someone questioned, probably the Chief.

"No, I was totally right about her, little miss bitch." That was Tom. That hurt and I felt tears sting my eyes.

"Are you sure?" The Chief pressed.

"Seriously don't worry."

"Listen, I just feel like I'm having a flashback, a flashback that happened three years ago." The Chief said.

"I don't regret what happened." Tom said.

"That's what worries me. Tom you need to be careful." He pressed on. "You were an idiot three years ago, you made some stupid mistakes and I see it happening again."

"David just chill out, I'm fine. It won't happen again."

I froze. David? As in David the guy who asked me to dance? That whole night was a lie. Can I really trust Tom? I mean the way him and David are talking, they are friends it's obvious. I just don't get what any of this is, I mean no body in my family is of utter importance. I sighed and rubbed the back of my head, hoping to somehow convince myself that none of this is happening.

It didn't work.

God who the hell is Tom? I mean seriously, he seems like he is a good guy deep down, way deep down but it's there I can tell. I mean he doesn't seem like he wants to hurt people but I mean to even be in the position he is he must of done something… awful.

Everyone had gone to sleep. It was quiet and I heard no footsteps above me. I wasn't tired. I was everything but tired. The silence was broken when the door opened. I looked up to see Tom. He didn't have a mask on. He was exposed.

I got up and faced him. He was better looking then I remembered. He didn't look threatening or dangerous. Just confused and unsure.

"I'm sorry." I finally said. "I just don't think your idea is smart at all."

"But me killing you is a smart idea?" He asked me, shaking his head.

I looked away and felt a stray tear fall trace the outline of my face. "I don't know, it doesn't matter."

Tom didn't say anything but sit down on the couch.

"Just don't worry about it." I finally said.

He looked at me in confusion.

"I'm okay with this." I said gesturing to my surroundings. "You're right. This is nothing compared to what people go through. I probably deserve this, you're right I'm just a selfish bitch who ignores what happens to other people." I said not meeting his eyes. "Just don't worry about me." I said turning around, not facing him. A lot of me thought he would leave and we would just forget everything that happened. I was wrong.

"Jude." He said softly, causing me to turn around to face him.

He was now right in front of me.

"I'm in a deep hole." He said looking at me. "I'm in a 30 foot deep hole and there is no ladder to get me out." He said meeting my eyes. "Saving you, I think miraculously this hole will have a ladder or will only be 2 feet deep." He put his hands on my shoulders. "You don't get it Jude. I _need _to save you. I _need _to get you out of here."

I felt tears enter my eyes. "I'm sorry." I said softly.

He didn't say anything, just tilted his head to the side in confusion.

"I was wrong about you." I said quietly.

"I think I was wrong about you too." He finally admitted, after a moment of silence.

I sighed and looked at him. "I wish you were right."

He looked thoughtfully at me and then looked away, uncomfortably.

"I'm in." I said breaking the awkward silence.

"What?" He questioned.

"We have nothing to loose right?" I questioned, referring to escaping. "I mean if I die it would have happen either way but…" I trailed off and met his eyes. "What about you?"

"Jude, I'd rather die this way, way better then dying working for these people." He said looking at me. "So are you ready?" He asked me.

It took me a moment to respond. "Wait?" I questioned, dumbfounded. "Now?"

He looked at me weirdly, like I asked him if he wanted tea or something. "Yeah now." He said slowly, confused.

"Shouldn't we plan this?" I asked him.

"What's there to plan?" He asked me.

"Um.. I don't know, where are we going?" I asked him.

"There's a small cabin nearby." He answered casually. "None of the guys know about it, I found it a few years ago."

"And none of the guys know about it?" I questioned, finding this a little too convenient.

He looked at me and then I saw a hint of hurt in his eyes. "You don't trust me do you?" He asked me.

"Well I don't know.." I said looking at him. "You and David seem really close."

It took Tom a moment to catch on to what I'm saying. "Wait, how do you know about…" I cut him off before he could finish.

"I'm not exactly cut off from you guys as much as you think. I can still hear what you say. You heard them say you're name." I pointed out to him.

He moaned and started pacing around the room. "You shouldn't know about David." He muttered.

"I shouldn't know about you either but…" I trailed off feeling confused, then it hit me. "This is a set up isn't it?"

Tom halted and looked at me, dumbfounded. "What?"

"This is all a set up." I said angrily, but soon fear washed over me, making the anger meaningless.

"Jude," He began, trying to pacify me, taking a step towards me.

I backed away from him, hoping I would find someway to escape. Stupidity got the best of me and I started to run upstairs. And yes by upstairs I mean upstairs to the door where there are three larger men are the other side.

I went to open the door but Tom's arms went around my waist and he violently pulled me down back to the bottom of the basement. I fell against the wall and cried out in pain.

He covered my mouth, to muffle my cries. "Are you an idiot?" He demanded. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Fuck you." I spat at him.

He stepped away from me and took out his anger to the nearest object, the sofa. "This isn't a setup Jude, Jesus just trust me."

"Trust you?" I started to laugh, hysterically. "Trust you, my kidnapper? Yeah okay I'll do that." I said sarcastically. I got up and noticed the side of my head was bleeding. I guess I fell against the wall pretty hard.

I saw Tom's face soften. "God, I'm sorry Jude." He said softly, tearing off a piece of his shirt and putting it against my head. I pulled away and snatched it from him. I put it against my head, refusing to let him help me.

"I thought we were past this." He said tensely.

"Past what?" I asked him.

"Past this whole not trusting each other." He said bluntly, gesturing to the wound on my head.

"Well sorry if I'm not entirely up to the guy who gave me this cut to touch me." I said stepping away from.

"What was I supposed to do Jude?" He demanded. "Just let you run out of here and get yourself killed?"

"And what this whole scheme of a plan that has a cabin that just happens to be conveniently close to here that conveniently none of the guys know about isn't a way to get me killed?" I asked furiously.

"Goddammit Jude if I wanted to kill you I would of by now." He said taking a step towards me.

"That's so reassuring." I said keeping my ground.

"Jude, if you don't trust me then fine." He said looking at me. "But like you said what do you have to loose? If you are so sure that you are going to die here and you are so sure you are going to die where I am taking you then why not take a chance?" He asked me. "I know you know that there is a chance I'm an okay guy so just forget about your stubbornness and leave with me now."

I looked at him and then looked away. "I'm trusting you." I said softly.

I heard him sigh in relief. "I know." He said quietly.

"Don't make me regret this." I said looking up at him.

"Don't make me regret this either." He said quietly.

"So we just… leave?" I questioned, finding this highly doubtful.

"Kind of." He said walking towards the bathroom. I followed him. I watched him as he lifted a tile. The tile had blended in so perfectly before that I barely noticed that it was leveled a little higher then the rest. I saw a ladder and looked at Tom.

"You see," He began, seeing the look of confusion in my face. "One day the police are going to find out about this place. So the guys had this sort of secret basement below a basement built. Food and everything is down here and a way to get out." He said and smiled at me.

I smiled back. "So along with an escape, we have food." I said unsurely.

"Exactly." He said and started going down the ladder. I stood still and I heard Tom stop.

"It's not scary, don't worry."

I timidly went on the ladder and slowly went down. When I was near the bottom I felt Tom's hand on my waist and within a matter of second my feet were on the bottom. He was already grabbing food and I took in my surroundings. The place was narrow and it seemed like it went on for miles. It was dimly lit and everything seemed to be different shades of brown.

"How long will it take to get out of here?" I asked him.

"Just a few minutes." Tom said grabbing his last bit of food. "It's not as long as you think." He said reading my mind. "Come on." He said motioning me to follow him. "This'll last for a few weeks." He said gesturing to the food.

"A few weeks?" I questioned. "How long are we going to have to hide out?" I asked him.

"As long as we have to." He answered simply.

A heavy silence filled the air but within a matter of minutes we were greeted by a door. Tom opened the door carefully and there was another ladder.

"Great." I muttered.

He either didn't hear me or decided to ignore me. "I'll go first, to make sure no one is nearby."

I followed him up the ladder and in about a minute we were out. Tom grabbed my hand and pulled me out and into a forest. The ladder was covered by leaves that had been stringed together and from a moments glance you wouldn't even notice it.

Tom grabbed my hand and before I could object he led me through the forest. We didn't talk the whole time, I just studied my surroundings hoping somehow, if I had to escape, I would know how to.

"Don't bother." Tom said reading my mind. "It took me years to figure this place out."

I didn't say anything. I watched as a cabin soon came into eyesight. Tom cautiously looked in the cabin and when he saw it was vacant he opened the door and led me in. It was colder in the cabin then outside and I involuntarily began to shiver. Tom noticed and he grabbed the last piece of fire wood and put it in the fireplace. He took out a match and within a few second the room filled with warmth.

"I'll get more fire wood later tonight." He said softly sitting down on a sofa. I looked around the cabin and noticed how small it was. There was a kitchen which consisted of a refrigerator, counter and stove. There was a small couch in front of the fireplace and a bed to the far right. I saw another door which I assumed led to the bathroom. It was small like I said but cozy. I leaned against the wall and sighed. I was tired.

"What time is it?" I asked him.

"Just past midnight." He answered getting up. "Are you hungry?" He asked me.

I shook my head no. "Just tired."

"You should go to sleep then." He said quietly.

I shook my head no, again.

"You're very hard to please." He observed a smiling beginning to form.

"Sorry." I said with a weak laugh. "I'm really fine. You've done a lot for me already, you don't have to worry."

"Okay." He said quietly. He took a step towards me and then I began to notice how close he was to me. My chest was barely grazing his.

"How do you know David?" I asked him.

Half of me expected him to step away and make an excuse not to answer. I was wrong. "He's my brother." He answered.

I tilted my head to the side, surprised.

"Well sort of." He said looking at me. "My mom married his dad when I was three and when he was six." He explained. "They're divorced now but we grew up together." Tom said with a shrug. "He got involved in some things, things that lead to now." He explained. "He tried to keep me away, he didn't want me to be apart of this…" He trailed off. "Of this life." He finally finished. "He was my older brother and I wanted to be just like him, so I didn't listen." He sighed. "David isn't a bad guy, he really isn't." Tom said wanting to make me understand. "He just doesn't get involved in work the way I do."

I looked at Tom and finally nodded. "I can tell he's not." I said softly. "The Chief, David," I said with a laugh. "He's about his business and not about the pain like the others. He's not a bad person, just in a bad position."

"Yeah." Tom agreed, looking depressed. "I wish I was more like him." He said looking at him. "You know was just about work. Didn't get emotionally involved."

I looked at Tom trying to catch his eyes. "I'm glad you're not like him." I said softly.

Tom looked at me when I said that. I met his eyes and saw something I hadn't seen before. Pain and longing. He took a step closer to me, causing me to fall against the wall. His right hand gently went up my side, then along my arm and softly caressed my cheek, causing me to hold my breath. He leaned in and slowly his face came closer to mine. His lips were scarcely an inch away from mine when I turned my face to the side. His lips were barely brushing my cheek when I began to speak.

"You should go." I said weakly. He didn't pull away he just let out an agitated sigh, I felt his warm breath against my skin causing me to shiver.

"Jude." He began quietly; I felt his lips move against my cheek.

I cut him off. "The fire is dying out." I said noticing the fireplace loosing its light while the room gradually lost its warmth.

Tom moved back a little bit and looked at the fireplace and then at me. "You should go to sleep Jude," He said looking at me, the pain and longing in his eyes intensifying. "It's been a long night." Then he left.


	7. Trust

**Chapter Seven- Trust**

I woke up drowsily to see the light barely coming through the windows. My whole body was mildly aching, causing me to groan softly. I gradually rose myself out of the bed and soon everything came to focus. The whole cabin was dimly lit, it was only morning, and it became evident to me that I was alone. That made me feel slightly uneasy and all I could hope was that Tom was okay or that didn't make a mistake by coming here. I saw there was sweats laying neatly on the table next to the bed. I assumed they were for me and I headed to bathroom to clean up. After successfully washing my hair and my body and coming out smelling sweet and thankfully clean, I decided to explore the cabin. I found a bookcase that before I hadn't noticed, it was small and it seemed it had too many books to handle. The books were all Jane Austin's classics and were from the 1800s. One of the books stood out among the rest. A Stephen King Novel, Carrie, interested I grabbed the book and sat down on the couch and started to read. Before I could finish with the first page Tom opened the door causing me to almost fall off the couch.

"Sorry." He said awkwardly. Then what almost happened last night hit me. I watched him as he brought in some more food.

"I thought," He began, breaking the silence. "I should get more food from the um… secret basement." He said uncomfortably.

"Good idea." I said softly, getting up from the couch.

"So… sleep well?" He questioned.

I nodded. "Yeah, you can have the bed tonight." I offered.

He shook his head in disagreement. "No it's fine. The couch is fine." He said turning away as he put the food on the one and only counter.

"Are you sure?" I questioned.

"Yeah." He answered simply. "Are you hungry?" He asked me.

In response my stomach growled and I laughed despite myself. "I guess so."

For some reason that seemed to break the tension and Tommy turned to smile at me. "So uncooked pop-tarts sound good?"

I smiled. "Sounds great."

After we ate we sat across the table looking each other. "So what happened three years ago?" I asked him, breaking the silence.

He looked up at me somewhat surprised. "You heard?" He questioned.

I nodded.

"A lot happened three years ago." He said softly.

I studied him, seeing how his shoulders slumped slightly and how he no longer could meet my eyes. "You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to."

"No I want to tell you." He said raising his eyes to meet mine. "I'm just not sure you want to hear it."

"I want to." I said honestly.

"Three years ago," He began. "I made some bad decisions." He said finished. "I had been working in the business about a year by then and I had seen some bad stuff but nothing compared to what I had seen that day. We had to kidnap a young girl. Her name was Julie and she was either seven or eight, I can't remember." He shrugged sadly. "I don't even remember why we had to kidnap her, it was better not to know." He said softly. "She was a beautiful girl. Dark brown natural curly hair and the biggest green eyes, I mean they were the definition of green." He said with a soft laugh. "She trusted us." He was silent for a moment. "I mean she honestly trusted us. She was so innocent." I saw tears enter his eyes. "I mean her skin was so pure an untouched, not by the sun, not by anything." He started smiling at a memory. "She use to call David, Mr. Boss Man and in away we all sort of loved her." A stray tear fell down her face and he didn't bother wiping it away. "She wasn't supposed to get hurt, she wasn't supposed to die." He covered his mouth with his knuckle, trying to contain his feelings.

"Tom." I said softly, causing him to get back on track.

"His name was Philip." He said gravely. "He wasn't a good person, everyone knew it." He said looking out the window. "The way he would touch her, the way he would look at her…" He trailed off, shutting his eyes. "She was the closest thing I had to daughter I guess you could say." He said softly.

"Did he…?" I questioned.

Tom cut me off. "Yeah." His voice came out weak and hollow. "I walked in on him coming up the stairs and all he said was 'She's a good fuck'." I saw Tom shudder. "She was lying on the ground, her skirt was across the room and blood was all over her." He began to cry and it took him a few minutes to get himself together. "She was dying." He said weakly. "I don't even know what she must have been thinking, what he must have done." He looked away and I felt tears come down my face. "I went to help her and she pulled away." Tom covered his mouth to contain his hollow cries. "She was afraid of me; she thought I was like _him_." He was silent for a moment, his body shaking from the pain inside him. "The last thing she said to me was 'please don't'." Tom took in a deep breath and he uneasily exhaled. "She died; she had lost so much blood."

I felt myself become sick. "It's not your fault."

Tom shook his head. "She trusted me." He said softly. "She trusted me to protect her and I didn't."

"Tom." I began.

"After that happened," He continued, barely noticing me. "I completely lost it." He said shaking his head. "Philip and his brother were the only one's here; David and the rest of the guys were seeing the head boss." He explained. "The only person Philip cared about was his brother. His name was Marc, he was a better person then Philip, and he was kind of quiet. I don't know why he worked here." He shrugged weakly. "I wanted Philip to suffer so I tied him up and tortured Marc in front of him." Tom coughed to smother a cry. "I mean I tortured this kid, he must have been 15, 16. I don't know." His face became wet by his tears. "I still hear the way Marc begged me to stop, how his cries became more and more painful but Philip didn't show any emotion and I wanted to see his pain. I ended up killing Marc." He shook his head. "If Philip cared, I couldn't tell." He was silent for a moment. "I was just as bad as Philip. I tortured and killed an innocent kid." He began to shake involuntarily. "I don't even know why I went after Marc."

"What happened to Philip?" I asked him.

Tom shook his head. "I killed him, shot him." He shook his head. "I should have tortured him, not Marc." He was silent for a moment. "I'm a murderer." His voice came out weak and hoarse.

I was silent.

"I'm an awful person, Jude." He said softly.

"You're not," I began desperately.

"Jude, don't trust me, please don't trust me." He said softly, as two tears came slowly down his face.


	8. Transformed

A/N: So I know I haven't written in ages but I'm not going to waste space coming up with excuses. I hope you enjoy.

**Chapter Eight- Transformed**

I was silent. Tom slowly rose to his feet and said something meaningless. I could barely hear him; all I thought was everything he must be going through. I watched him as he left and I finally came to focus.

"Tom?" I questioned, racing after him. He halted and turned to look at me. Tears were stained on his cheeks.

"Jude, not now." He said quietly.

"I trust you." I said softly.

At first I wasn't sure he heard me but when he looked at me, I was positive he did. "You shouldn't." His voice was strained.

I placed my hand in his and squeezed it gently. "But I do." I said quietly

He leaned his forehead against mine. "Please don't do this to me." He said softly.

I didn't say anything at first. "Don't do what?" I asked him.

He pulled away and studied me. "Come on, it's late." He said and let go of my hand.

"Tommy." I insisted.

He froze. "Tommy?" He turned and looked at me.

I looked at him, confused. "I um…" I trailed off. "It fits you." I said softly.

He looked away and he let out a shaky sigh.

"I um… I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" He cut me off.

"No it just brings back memories." He said meeting my eyes. "My mom use to call me that." He turned and walked away.

I knew not to push him. I quietly followed and watched him as he sat on a stray stump. I went over to him and smiled weakly.

"I'll be inside." I said timidly.

He didn't look at me. "I won't be in for awhile." He said distractedly.

I nodded and left. I opened the door and sat down on the bed. I was so tired. Everything became a blur and I fell asleep.

"_Miss Harrison how old are you?" The man in the suit asked me._

"_I'm seven." I answered timidly. I tugged nervously on the end of my skirt._

"_What can you tell me about your father?" He asked._

"_He's nice." I said weakly._

"_Would you say your father is dependable?" He asked me._

_I looked over at my mom, who gave me an encouraging smile. "Um... yes?" I almost questioned._

_He studied me and I looked away. "Miss Harrison, how close were you to you're father?"_

_I didn't answer, I was too busy crying._

I woke up and saw it was still night time. Tommy was asleep on the couch. I went over to him and saw how deep the wrinkles on his forehead were. I touched them softly causing him to stir. His eyes opened and focused of me.

I backed away. "Sorry, I didn't mean to."

"Jude it is fine." He promised me. He sat up and I sat down by him and looked at him thoughtfully.

"What?" He asked me uncomfortably.

I shook my head. "Nothing." I said softly and looked away.

Tommy touched my hand causing me to look at him. "You cry in your sleep." He said gently.

I unconsciously touched my face and it was wet. I laughed softly. "Yeah I guess I do."

He studied me for a moment and sighed. "I'm sorry Jude."

I looked over at him. "Don't be." I said quietly.

He looked out the window, into the endless darkness. "Her name was Mackenzie." He said softly.

"Who?" I asked curiously, studying the sadness in his eyes.

"My mom." He said quietly. "She was the only one who called me Tommy." He looked over at me. "Well until now."

I looked away and fretfully played with a strand of hair. "What was she like?" I asked him.

He smiled and I saw tears begin to form. "She was a total mom." He said, I noticed a lump forming in his throat. "You know a good cook, nice, loves you no matter what…" He trailed off and looked into the darkness once again.

I did not say anything; I just sat by him, playing with my hands. It was something I always did when I was nervous. I did not notice Tommy had been watching me until his hand went over my hands causing them to stop. I looked up at him and his eyes were focused on mine.

I looked at him and felt tears enter my eyes, it was involuntary; I felt so weak around him. He looked startled as tears slowly fell down my cheek. I turned away to hide my tears but Tommy stopped me.

"No," He said quietly. "Let me." He wiped away each tear, refusing to meet my eyes. He was thinking about what happened two nights ago, or I guess what did not happen two nights ago.

He pulled his hands away and I felt myself look down at my hands, which were moving nervously again.

"Why do you do that?" He asked me, staring at my hands also.

"I do it when I'm nervous." I said quietly.

He looked at me. "Do I make you nervous?" He questioned; his voice quiet.

"Yes." I breathed.

He was searching for my eyes but I did not give it to him, I focused on my hands and watched as they became more frantic. He saw this too and I felt him edge closer to me.

My pulse quickened and I felt tears come down my face. Tommy's breath stopped when he saw this. He wiped away the tears and held my face in his hands.

"I don't mean to make you cry." He said looking in my eyes. I wasn't able to escape his stare.

"I'm just tired." I said helplessly.

He didn't say anything at first. "Is that really it?" He asked me.

I pulled away from him and looked out the window, the sun was beginning to rise, and rays of gold, red, orange, and surprisingly purple were filling the room.

"I can't fake it around you." I said softly.

He leaned closer to me, I guess to hear me better. "I don't understand." He said watching me.

I continued to look out the window, at the beautiful colors. "For nine years," I said quietly. "I was able to hide every emotion I had and mask them with false happiness, when I'm around you I can't hide anymore." I finally looked at him, his dark eyes, the ones I considered dangerous and harsh, were completely transformed. They were dark yes but full of wisdom and most of all they were safe. "I cannot lie to you, you're eyes won't let me."

My hands were nervously moving and he put his hands over mine to calm them.

"Thank you." He said softly.

I looked at him. "Why?"

"For not lying to me." He said looking in my eyes causing my hand to move nervously under his. He noticed this and started caressing my hands.

"Your welcome." My voice came out shaky. "I want to say thank you also."

"Why?" He asked me.

"Do you remember the first day this all happened and I got all cut up?" I asked him.

He winced. "Yeah I remember."

"Thank you for being so kind to me." I said meeting his eyes.

"I did not want to hurt you." He said looking at me.

"You did not even like me." I said looking at him.

"I didn't know you."

I didn't say anything and broke his gaze. I looked out the window and saw that the trees were fully lit. It must be around seven. His hands continued to caress mine, making it harder for me to ignore his stare.

"Jude." He said finally, forcing me to look at him.

"Yes." I said weakly.

"Can I kiss you?" He said looking at me, his eyes searching mine.

It came as a shock to me. He didn't make any advances towards me, he wanted my answer. I watched his breathing become irregular he wanted to kiss me so badly but he wanted me to want it. At first I didn't know what to say but then it became obvious.

"Can I kiss you back?" I asked him.

I watched as his face transformed to a smile of genunine happiness. He filled in the space between us and the tension that had become so thick exploded when our lips touched. He no longer made me nervous but the exact opposite. He made me calm.


	9. Living Dead

A/N: Hi guys! I'm glad you liked the last chapter, I wasn't sure if the whole "can I kiss you" thing was a good thing, but I'm happy you guys like it. Thanks for not giving up on me.

**Chapter Nine- Living Dead**

We only kissed once. One simple kiss that made almost everything that happened worth it, for this one moment. I pulled away from the kiss and leaned my forehead against his. We breathed in unison, both out of breath, not completely sure why.

He pulled away from me and just smiled at me. The darkness in his eyes was lighter and accompanied with true bliss.

I smiled back and reached over to push back a strand of hair that went astray. He naturally leaned into my hand and we looked at each other. So much of me wanted to throw my arms around him and kiss him, feel him but I restrained myself.

"You're beautiful." He said after a moment of silence.

I smiled at him and kissed him softly on the cheek. Instead of engaging me in a kiss, he guided me to lie on his chest. It felt so right. He stroked my hair as I listened to his heartbeat. Slow and strong.

We laid there in silence. Not in awkward silence, trying to think of meaningless things to say but just pure silence.

After awhile I began to feel hungry I got up from Tommy and saw that he was watching me.

"I'm going to get something to eat, do you want something?" I asked him.

He got up, his hair a little ruffled, making him even more irresistible. "I'll get it." He offered.

We went into the kitchen, both extremely aware of each others presence. I wanted toast and butter and he just wanted a sandwich. When my toast was done I began to butter it, slowly and carefully. I knew Tommy was watching me. I felt two arms go on both sides of me and I felt warm breath against my neck causing me to shiver.

"Are you cold?" He asked me.

I turned around to face him. "No." I said softly, putting my arms around his neck.

He smiled. "No?" He questioned playfully.

"No." I said with a grin. "I'm actually quite hot."

I watched him smile, a devilish smile. "I agree." He said softly and then he kissed me on the lips. Many people say there is nothing like the first kiss but I have to say the second kiss is simply perfect.

I pulled away from the kiss and turned to finish my toast. He put his hands on my hips and kissed me softly on the neck. He returned back to his sandwich and we both sat down on the couch.

"What happened nine years ago?" He asked me, after he took a bite of his sandwich.

I looked at him, surprised.

He began to explain. "You were saying how nine years ago you began to hide your feelings, why?" He questioned.

I did not say anything at first; I looked down at my hands instead.

"Jude." He insisted.

"I haven't talked about this…ever." I said quietly, realizing how true that was.

He put his hand over mine, causing me to look at him. "Tell me when you're ready."

"I'm ready, I just…" I trailed off not sure where to start.

Tommy just sat and waited patiently.

I silently contemplated where I should start. "It happened nine years ago," I began. "When I was seven…."

**Flashback: Nine Years Earlier**

I heard the phone ring and I went to answer it but my mom beat me to it. I always liked answering the phone; you could meet someone new just by hearing their voice. I assumed it was my dad since he usually got home before now, he was calling that he was going to be late.

I walked to my mom's room an hour or so later to ask when dad would be home, but I froze when I saw she was on the floor in tears. She was shaking violently trying to muffle the painful cries erupting in her throat. The phone was on the ground in pieces.

"Mommy?" I questioned nervously.

I watched as she unsuccessfully tried to compose herself, and broke down, now making gasping sounds.

"Mommy?" I pleaded this time, now she didn't respond to me, I'm not even sure she heard me. I cautiously walked over to her and saw she was holding a picture in her hands. I felt everything go cold inside me.

My mom threw her arms around and hugged me tightly, afraid that I would leave her.

"Jude," She began. "He's gone," She held me tighter. "Honey he's gone."

"Daddy?" I questioned, staring at the photo of him. My mom loved this picture of him. He was naturally smiling, not awkwardly trying his best to smile but smiling; that smile that made her fall in love with him.

My mom didn't answer me for awhile she was crying now even harder I continued to hug her, I didn't cry, I didn't understand.

"Yes honey," She finally said her voice shaky and weak. "Daddy's gone."

"Where did he go?" I asked her confused. "When will I see him again?" I asked.

My mom fought back the tears that were begging to burst out. "You won't be able to see him again." She said carefully.

Then it hit me and I began to cry. "Daddy's dead?" I asked between sobs.

"Yes." My mom said quietly. "He was murdered."

Then I threw up.

**End of Flashback**

"They only found his right arm." I finished my voice was hoarse and pained. Even after nine years it hurt to talk about it.

Tommy was strangely quiet.

"Tommy?" I questioned.

He refused to look at me.

"Tommy." I insisted, hurt that he wouldn't look at me.

He finally looked at me. "What's up with you?" I asked, studying him.

"Is your dad's first name Stuart?" He asked me.

"Yeah…" I trailed off. "How did you know?" I started feeling uneasy.

"Jude," He began, avoiding my stare. "Your dad's alive."


	10. Eyes of Death

**Chapter Ten- Eyes of Death**

I looked at Tommy in disbelief. "What?" My voice came out harsh and confused.

Tommy continued to stare at his hands. "Your father is alive."

"No," I said shaking my head, tears started pouring down my face. "He died nine years ago on April…"

Tommy cut me off. "Seventeenth." He finished.

I stared at him incredulously. "He was murdered…" I began.

"How do you know that?" He asked me, finally meeting my eyes.

"There is evidence…"

He didn't let me finish. "Evidence?" He said with a laugh. "An arm Jude, a man can function without an arm."

"Don't laugh at me." I said anger getting the best of me. "My father is dead and you are trying to say he's not."

"Jude," He began.

"No." I said pushing him. I was so angry, so hurt. "How do you know he's not dead, how do you know…"

Tommy cut me off. "Because I helped kidnap him."

I didn't yell, I didn't do anything, I just stood there. I looked at Tommy and I felt sick.

"I don't," I began feeling dead inside. "Understand."

Tommy never looked so ashamed; he was avoiding my eyes completely.

"Nine years ago I started working in this business." He said quietly. "I was seventeen and stupid. I wanted to be like my older brother." He explained. "My first like really big job was on the seventeenth of April." He looked at me for a moment. "They never really explain the background of the people just basics. Name, status, children, the usual." He said quietly. "All I knew was that his name was Stuart Harrison, married, one child." He looked at me for a fleeting moment. "The whole point of the abducting was making sure he looked like he had been murdered. We found him walking home from work."

This brought back memories and I felt tears enter my eyes. Every Friday instead of taking the car he walks to and from work. It was his one way to be alone; it was something that was his own. He always looked forward to it.

Tommy continued. "We sedated him; made sure he was knocked out and cut off his arm. We made sure he hadn't felt anything, it would hurt when he woke up but it would be nothing compared to the pain he would feel during the cutting." Tommy winced when he said that. "The people running this, the ones above David, they need your father for something, he's useful to them somehow." He shrugged helplessly. "I'm surprised the police didn't look into this case too much, finding a missing arm doesn't usually mean case close."

I never felt so disgusted in my life. It took everything in me, to not scream at him but I needed answers. "Did you ever talk to him?" I finally asked him.

He shook his head. "He was still knocked out the last time I saw him."

I continued to stare at my hands. "Did you cut off his arm?" I asked him feeling sicker by the second.

"No." Tommy said softly. "I didn't even see them do it." He assured me. "I had to watch the roads to make sure no one would pass by and see what was happening."

I remember vaguely mom saying that people riding their bikes saw his arm on the side of the road.

"Jude," He began coming towards me.

"I hate you." I said quietly.

Tommy froze and looked at me. "Jude," He pleaded.

"You are the reason I didn't have a father for nine years." I screamed. "Nine years Tommy, for nine years I heard my mom cry every night, for nine years I didn't give anyone a gift for fathers day, for nine years I had to go to a home that everything in it reminded me of _him, _for nine years I thought every person I saw was his murderer." I went silent and then looked at him accusingly. "How could you not tell me this until now?" I demanded.

Tommy looked shocked. "I just found out."

"I'm sure," I said, feeling tears come down my face. "You get background information right? Jude Harrison, one mom no dad, is it that hard to put together?"

"All I knew about you was your birthday and that your sixteen nothing else." He said looking at me. "How was I supposed to know Jude?" He asked me. "It happened nine years ago," He began desperately. "How was I supposed to know it would lead to this moment?" He asked in frustration. "How was I supposed to know his one child was you?" He asked me.

I silently glared at him. "I kissed you." I said softly, feeling every part of me he touched was diseased.

"Jude," He began coming towards me. "That kiss was real, this is real." He said reaching out to touch my face but I violently pulled away.

"Don't touch me." I said shrilly.

Tommy stepped back.

"You can't make this right." I said looking at him, the anger dying in me; now replacing it was hurt and betrayal. "You are not the man I thought you were." I turned to leave.

"Jude your dad's alive, hate me but he's alive." Tommy said quietly trying to make a point.

"How do you know he's alive?" He was about to say something but I didn't let him. "How do you know they didn't kill two years ago or the day you kidnapped him?" I demanded.

Tommy was quiet, he finally spoke up. "I don't know." He admitted. "But he's important I know that."

"How do you know?" I asked him, frustrated but primarily tired.

"The way they kept saying don't kill him, what ever you do do _not_ kill him. He's important, they need his help." He said desperately.

"My dad would never work for these people." I said angrily.

"How close were you to your father?" He asked me. Accusing me of not knowing my own father.

I thought of the man in the suit asking me that very question. "Fuck you." I said quietly and started to walk away. Tommy grabbed my hand but I snatched it away.

I began to run.

I knew Tommy was chasing after me but I continued to speed up, so much anger, confusion, and pain was boiling up inside me. I finally began to loose my breath and stopped to relax. It was dark and they it finally hit me I was alone in the woods. I must of gone deep in the forest because I could barely see the sky and it was deathly quiet. I heard a branch break and turned around expecting it to be Tommy.

I was wrong.

"Jude I told you your death would be your fault." I stared at man in front of me. It was David, his face was exposed; he looked slightly deranged. He raised his hand and I saw he was holding something. I went cold. "I warned you." And he pointed the gun right at my head.

This is what it must be like looking in the eyes of death.


	11. I Know

**Chapter Eleven- I Know**

I looked at David then at the gun, then back at David. "Please don't…" I said softly, one tears slowly tracing my face.

I saw David weaken for a moment but then he straightened up. "I warned you Jude." He repeated. He pointed the gun powerfully at me, almost forcing himself.

"What are you doing David?" I didn't look to see who it was, it was Tommy; I knew that voice.

"Tom you know what? You are a _fucking _idiot." David said glaring at Tommy. "I should kill you next." He said furiously.

"Your own brother, huh?" Tommy questioned with distaste.

"Don't look down on me Tom, don't you _dare _look down on me." David said tensely.

Tommy stood his ground and held David's stare.

"I'm doing my job Tom," David began. "And you're getting in the way and I can't have that."

"You can't have that?" Tommy demanded laughing hysterically. "We're _murderers_." He said gesturing to him and David. "God we are fucking cold-blooded _murderers_ David."

"Tom you knew what you were getting into the minute you started working for these people." David said his voice rising.

"I was seventeen and stupid David, I didn't think we would actually _kill_ people." Tommy said frustratingly.

"I tried to keep you away but you were so damn stubborn." David said harshly.

"Because I wanted to be like _you_." David's face softened when Tommy said that. "God David, you were everything I wanted to be, you were my hero."

David unwillingly put his gun down and looked at Tommy. "Some hero I was huh?" I exhaled, realizing I had been holding my breath.

"You still are." Tommy said quietly.

David didn't say anything, he then looked at me. I saw his face harden and he raised the gun and pointed it at me again.

"I have to do it Tom." He said shakily.

"You can't David." Tom pleaded.

"Tom I have to do my job." He said his composure rigid.

"Your job?" Tommy questioned. "You and me are better then this David, then this worthless existence."

"That's where you are wrong." His gun was still pointing at me. "You're better then this and I knew that." He started looking guilty. "I should have kept you away." He said quietly.

"You tried." Tommy swore.

"And I failed," His voice was strained. "Like I do at everything else." He got a better grip on the gun and looked at me. "I warned you Jude." He said softly.

"David you can't." Tommy said taking a step forward, he was now panicked.

David didn't look at him; his eyes were locked with mine. "Why Tom?" He demanded. "Give me one good reason."

"Because I'm in _love_ with her." He said quietly.

For the first time I looked at Tommy and he looked at me. I turned my head and looked back at David who was staring at me. He was weakening, it was obvious. He licked his lips nervously, he was hating himself right then, I could tell.

"Do you really?" He asked Tommy. He then looked at Tommy. "Tom," He began. "You love her?" He asked him.

"Yes." He breathed.

He turned and looked at me. He was touching the trigger with his finger, tears were entering his eyes and he was shaking his head.

He couldn't do it.

His arm gave up and the gun was facing the ground. I sighed in relief and Tommy went over to David. They both looked at each other and then they hugged, not like how men hug but like brothers who loved each other.

"Thank you." I heard Tommy say.

"Anything for you little brother." David said affectingly.

I stood on the side awkwardly, not sure what to do. All I knew is that I should stay with Tommy, obviously running out in the middle of the woods at night _and_ by myself was not the smartest thing ever.

David looked at me then at Tommy. "What am I suppose to do Tom?" He asked him.

"What do you mean?" Tommy questioned.

"I can't just leave and go back to the guys, claiming I couldn't find you guys." He said with a moan. "I've been searching for you guys since the day we figured out you left." He looked at Tommy. "You made me look bad to the guys above us Tom." There was worry in his face.

"Then don't go back." Tommy said with passion. "Join me and Jude, escape from this shit hole."

"I'm not like you Tom," David began. "I don't just run away from my problems."

"David this is not just a problem, it's a lifestyle that is slowly killing us." Tommy said, trying to make a point.

"I made a commitment working here." David said tensely.

"What about the commitment to me?" Tommy asked him. "Me? Your brother?"

David looked at him and sighed. "Tom you will _always _come first, you know that."

"Then come with us." He said gesturing to him and me.

David looked at me then at Tommy. "I don't want to get in the way of you two." He said looking over at me again.

"You won't." I promised, I saw Tommy look at me.

David looked at Tommy. "Okay Tom I'm in." He sai d softly.

I watched Tommy's face brighten and he smiled. "You sure?" He questioned.

"Yeah." David answered simply. "You know that these people are going to start looking for us?" He questioned. "You know especially since both of us will be missing."

"Yeah I know." Tommy said quietly.

David looked at him. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"I've already started David." Tommy pointed out.

"Yeah but bringing me into this is going to be more _complicated_."

"I know but I like complicated."

David looked at him and then laughed. "If I wanted to leave you wouldn't let me would you?" He questioned.

"Not a chance." Tommy answered.

They both laughed. "Come on, I'll show you where we are staying." Tommy said leading the way. I followed behind feeling out of place.

"Why were you guys way out here anyway?" David asked.

"We got into an," Tommy looked at me. "Argument."

David didn't ask anything else. We walked in silence. Soon the cabin came into view and I felt relief wash over me. All I wanted to do was lay down and go to sleep.

"Um… you two go ahead." David offered. "I'll just hang back." He wanted to give me and Tommy and space.

I looked at David and smiled. "Goodnight David."

"Goodnight Jude." He said looking at me. "Sorry about the whole gun thing." He apologized awkwardly.

"You were just doing your job." I said, accepting his apology.

"Yeah and I'm through with that so you don't have to worry." He said with a laugh.

"Good to know." I said laughing with him. "Bye." I said with a little wave and left for the cabin. On the corner of my eye I could see Tommy and David talking. I walked into the cabin and lay down on the bed. My father's _alive_.

The cabin door opened and Tommy walked in. "Can we talk?" He asked me.

I sat up on the bed. "I'm said all I wanted." I said stubbornly.

He came towards. "Please talk to me." He looked at me pleadingly.

I got up reluctantly. "Okay." I said, giving in.

"I'm sorry." He finally said after an awkward silence filled the room.

"That's all you say?" I asked him.

"What do you want me to say?" He demanded. He was frustrated.

"I don't know." I yelled, tears streaming down my face. "God my father's _alive_ Tommy and you are the reason I thought he was dead."

Tommy looked at me, so much pain was in his eyes. "Your father's alive Jude, shouldn't that make you happy."

"No." My voice was strained. "It took me _so _long, so _long_, to get use to the fact that my father was dead." I said painfully. "Now he's alive?" I questioned, throwing up my hand in frustration. "It's too much."

"What can I do?" Tommy asked me. "What can I do to make you forgive me?" He asked me. "What can do to make this easier for you?" He questioned desperately.

"Nothing, you've done enough." I said bitterly.

"Jude do something." He said looking at me after a moment of silence. "Yell at me, hit me, do something."

I looked at him and all the anger and frustration exploded. I slapped him hard on the face. It left an obvious red mark left. I slapped him again with my other hand, same outcome. Tommy didn't say anything he just looked at me in that way he always does.

That made me furious.

I began punching him, tears were entering my eyes. I continued punching him. I wanted him to fall back in pain, he didn't. I wasn't hurting him; I wanted to, I wanted him to hurt like I hurt. I felt myself beginning to loose control and I collapsed into sobs.

He caught me in his arms and I tried to fight him off but I couldn't. I was so tired.

"I hate you." My voice was muffled in his shirt.

"I know." His voice was pained. He was holding me in his arms.

"I hate you _so _much." I said sobbing.

"I know." He said, beginning to cry.


	12. Three Weeks

**Chapter Twelve- Three Weeks **

It's been three weeks since I had that breakdown. Twenty-one days since I've spoken to Tommy. Five-hundred-and-four hours since I've spoken to anyone. We were still in this confined cabin where it was difficult to breathe. I always listened to Tommy and David, even though they thought I wasn't. They were attempting to plan an escape, a way to flee their life. Attempting is the key word.

I was outside, sitting under the tree with the yellow and green leaves. The other trees only had green leaves. This tree was different, special even. I was reading one of the books from the cabin. One book a day. All amazing, all profound, and all different.

"Jude." I looked up startled to hear my name. After the first week, Tommy gave up on trying to talk to me. David never bothered with me.

Until now.

It took me a moment to respond. "Hi." My voice was squeaky.

"Hi." David said quietly sitting down by me. He looked at me and I looked away instantly. "So…" He began. "How are you?" He asked me.

I shrugged indifferently. "Fine." I said tensely.

"Really?" He questioned almost mockingly. He was looking pointedly at my hand.

I looked down and saw my hand was clenched tightly. "What do you want?" I said, getting to the point.

He sighed and leaned against the tree and studied me. "You're a smart girl Jude." He observed.

I didn't say anything.

"Why are you acting like such a dumbass?" He asked me. "Why are you punishing Tom?"

"I'm not punishing him." I said defensively.

"Then what are you doing?" He asked me.

"I'm sorry if I don't want to talk to the man who is the reason I didn't have a father for _nine _years." I said crossly, beginning to stand up but David pulled me down.

"Don't touch me." I said furiously.

He ignored me. "Jude be logical." He said staring me down. "Tom isn't the reason your father wasn't in your life for nine years." He said irritated. "You just want someone to blame."

"That's not true." I said softly, _weakly_.

I watched David shrink back, taken back by my change in tone. "Then what is?" He said softer then before.

I didn't say anything at first. "I don't know you." I finally said.

"That can always change." He said gently.

I finally looked at him. "I'm not going to talk to you about this." I said sternly

He nodded, defeated. "Tom is an amazing guy." He said standing up, looking down at me. "He's the best one out there." He promised me. "He's just a good guy in a bad situation."

I smiled when he said that. "He said the same thing about you."

He laughed softly, almost painfully. "Yeah Tom and I always seem to be each others number one fans." He turned and walked away.

I shut the book, realizing I wouldn't be able to concentrate. I watched as David left to get firewood, leaving me and Tommy alone.

I felt myself stand up and walked slowly towards the door. I went to turn the handle but I stopped myself. _What am I doing? _I looked blankly at the door and was about to turn around when it opened.

Tommy stood there looking at me. Shocked to see me and shocked that I was this close to him. I backed away immediately.

He didn't advance towards me he just looked at me. Pain was prominent in his eyes. He tore his gaze from me and walked past me, careful not to touch me.

I did not move at first, it hurt to be close to him. I walked inside the cabin. I only went in the cabin at night. I avoided any contact with Tommy. I sat done on the couch, and held my face in my hands. _What am I doing? Why am I not outside reading the book?_

Then he walked in the cabin.

That was my answer.

I watched Tommy look at me. He was hurting; he briskly looked away and sat down at the table. The farthest place from me. I stood up and I felt his eyes on me. I walked over to the bookshelf and touched every book I had read. He was watching me, he didn't want to, but he was.

I finally looked at him and this time he didn't look away, this time he looked straight at me.

"Tommy." I said softly.

It hurt him when I said his name. He closed his eyes as though my voice was cutting him.

He finally opened his eyes after a few moments. "Hi." His voice was cold.

I felt tears enter my eyes. Tommy stood up when he saw this. "Don't." He said tensely.

I backed away.

"Don't do this to me." He said taking a step towards me.

I backed away from him.

"Don't make me want to hold you, kiss you, _love _you." I ached when he said love. "If you hate me," His voice was harsh and wounded. "Then hate me, don't come in here and make me have feelings for you." He said looking at me. "Let me forget you." His voice was faint.

I shut my eyes when he said that. "I don't hate you."

"I heard different three weeks ago." He said emotionlessly.

"I don't hate you." I repeated.

"You haven't spoken to me for _three_ weeks Jude." He now had emotion and it was anger.

"I was _hurt_." I said angrily and full with pain. "And confused and tired and shocked." I said tears entering my eyes. "And I was weak and I didn't know what to do." I was silent for a moment. "I felt betrayed." I said finally looking at him.

He shut his eyes and leaned against the wall opposite of me. I was against the bookcase tears streaming down my face.

"I was angry and I needed someone to blame." I thought of David for a moment. "And you were there and it was unfair to you." I said quietly. "It wasn't your fault." I finally admitted. He looked at me. "I just couldn't get over the fact that the man that I kissed was an accomplice in the absence of my dad." I said quietly. "But you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time." I said looking at my hands. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry." He said quietly after a few minutes of silence. I looked up and saw Tommy walking towards me. "You had every reason to be angry with me; I just couldn't stand being so close to you but so far at the same time." He stopped in front of me. We were not touching but that could change with just one step.

I took that step and touched his face softly. But then I pulled my hand away.

"What?" He questioned, concerned.

"This isn't right." I said softly, hating myself.

"What?" His voice no longer concerned but hurt and confused.

"I mean you are ten years older then me." I began helplessly.

"Jude why are you doing this?" He asked me.

"And," I began, ignoring him. "You assisted in my dad's kidnapping and you kidnapped me." I was silent for a moment. "We don't even _truly _know each other Tommy and there are just so many reasons why this wrong."

He was silent, waiting for me to go on. "Are you done?" He asked me.

I nodded feebly.

"Do you want to know why we are good for each other?" He asked me. "Why this is right?" He demanded. "You surprise me Jude." He said looking at me. "No one surprises me but you do and that says _a lot_." He said studying me. "When I'm with you I have this immediate relaxation wash over me but at any moment you can make me a wreck." He said with a tired smile. "You affect me and sometimes that just about kills me but I wouldn't change it." He touched my face softly. "I love how you smell and how you feel." He caressed my cheek. "We may not have known each other long but you _know_ me and I _know_ you." He looked at me. "And I _love _that you call me Tommy." He said softly tears entering his eyes. "And everything that makes this relationship unworthy or anything below perfection is _nothing _compared to what makes us…." He trailed off trying to find the right words. "Us." He breathed, deciding on one simple two-lettered word.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the bookcase.

"I'm in love with you Jude; I'm in love with us." He said stepping away from me. "I'm here Jude, I just wish you were." He turned and walked away.


	13. Broken Wall

**Chapter Thirteen- Broken Wall**

I did not go after him. I did not throw my arms around him. I did not kiss him. I did not tell him I loved him.

I stood there blankly. There was nothing I could say that would measure up to all the beautiful and thoughtful things he said to me. I turned around and left.

Yes I left.

Extremely pathetic of me but what else am I but pathetic? Aw yes I remember, a bitch.

I was walking out of the cabin when I saw David. He was carrying some firewood and it was easy to tell in a matter of seconds one piece was going to fall out of his grasp, and many to follow.

I went to his rescue and he thanked me gratefully.

"So," He began, as he placed the fire wood by the cabin. "Did you talk to Tom?"

"Yeah, how did you know?" I questioned, studying him from afar. He was extremely good looking. He had only one dimple. It was on his right cheek.

"Just a guess," He answered simply. "I figured if I left for a while you would get the courage to go in the cabin."

I did not say anything, just thought about the word courage.

"Didn't go how you planned?" He asked me, straightening up and looking at me.

I thought about the question. I did not really know what to expect when I went into the cabin. I guess it was some version of what actually happened.

"Um… yeah I guess," I answered. "Mainly on my part, though." I said honestly.

"What did you do?" He inquired.

"Nothing." I said with a tired laugh. "Absolutely nothing."

"Aw… I see." He said with a small smile. "Funny how doing nothing can do so much."

"Yeah hilarious." I said bitterly.

"Well then go do something." He said simply. "Just go in there." He said gesturing to the cabin.

"It's not that easy." I said quietly.

"It's not supposed to be easy Jude," He said. "Being honest with someone you've been dishonest with is difficult."

"I haven't been dishonest with Tommy." I said defensively.

"Oh my mistake," David said sarcastically. "I thought telling the man you love that you hate him is dishonest."

"He told you that?" I demanded.

"No." David said. "I overheard you telling him that." He sighed. "Tom is a private person and doesn't even show his true feeling to me." He looked at me. "He doesn't let his own brother in but he lets you in." He shook his head. "You really know how to hurt him Jude."

I felt tears enter my eyes. "He hurts me too."

"He never intended to hurt you and you know that." He said crossly. "You want to hurt him."

"No I don't." I completely yelled at him. "He means so much to me." I said softer then before. "But I can't get pass all the things that makes him and me wrong." I was silent for the moment. "The age, the kidnapping," I began. "And my dad. I mean if this all works out right and we are free. Then what?" I demanded. "Then he goes to jail?" I questioned. "I can't be with him unless we are on the run. And if we are not on the run then he's in jail." I was silent for a moment. "What kind of life is that?"

David didn't say anything at first. "Do you love him?" He asked me.

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

"Do. You. Love. Him?" He demanded.

"What if I do?" I asked him. "How does that change anything?"

"It doesn't." He answered.

"Then why does it matter?"

"It matters more then anything Jude." David said looking at me.

I didn't say anything. Then I looked at the door and knew what I had to do. I looked back at David and he smiled at mw.

"I'll be out." He said smoothly. "You know, umm… getting firewood," He paused. "Again." He said with an easy smile.

"Yeah okay." I said with a laugh. "Thank you." I said honestly.

"Hey what are brother-in-laws for?" He asked teasingly. Then he looked at me. "I saw how Tom looked at you and I didn't understand why." He said studying me. "And now I do." He met my eyes. "Don't hurt him anymore Jude, Tom deserves to be happy. And you give can give that to him." He then turned around and strolled away.

I smiled and watched him walk away. He was a good guy. Tommy was right. And he was right about him and me. About us. I took a deep breath and turned the knob. Tommy was sitting at the table. Head in his hands. He looked up when I closed the door.

"Where have you been David?" He stopped when he saw me.

"He's getting firewood." I said softly.

Tommy looked at me blankly.

"David is getting more firewood." I said nervously.

"Ah," Tommy said without interest.

"Tommy," I began weakly.

"What are you doing here Jude?" He demanded angrily.

I shrank back surprised by his tone. Tommy didn't notice. "Why are you here?" He yelled.

"I wanted to talk to you." I said softly, hurt by his rage.

"I heard what you said before." He said bitterly. "I don't need to hear it again."

"Tommy." I said desperately.

"Don't Jude." He said tensely. "Don't talk to me; don't give me hope and then just spit in my face."

"I'm sorry." I said tears welling up in my eyes.

Tommy faltered but then he put the wall back up. I now understood by what David meant by Tommy not showing his true feelings. "I don't care Jude, I can't care."

"Why are you doing this?" I asked him.

"Don't say that to me." He said crossly taking a step towards me. "Don't come in here and act like you care about me."

"I do care about you." I said taking a step away from.

"Then why are you stepping away from me?" He asked me.

"Because you're scaring me." I said quietly.

"Because I've given you so many reasons to fear me." He said mockingly.

"Now you're giving me a reason." I said strongly. I wasn't going to let him talk to me this way.

He looked at me and then looked away ashamed. "Why are you here?" He asked me again, only softer and gentler.

"I have something I want to say." I said looking at my hands.

"I don't want to hear it." He said harshly.

"Will you fucking be quiet?" I demanded.

Tommy looked startled by my outburst.

"Tommy," I began. "You are a great man." I said looking at him. "Your smile, your eyes your everything makes me smile."

His wall started crumbling.

"I love that even when you hated me, you still bandaged me up when I was hurt so badly." I looked at him.

"I could never hate you." Tommy said quietly.

"Even with everything you've gone through you are still are the most amazing person I know." I was silent for a moment and finally looked at Tommy. "I love that you love that I call you Tommy." His eyes met mine when I said that. "I love that you know me and I hate that you know me." I was silent for a moment trying to organize my thoughts. "You are so _incredible _and I'm deeply, passionately and utterly in love with you, in love with _us_." My voice softened at us.

He breathed in sharply and looked at me. Searching my eyes. "What did you say?" He asked me, some much tension in his voice.

"I'm in love with you, Tommy." I said tears in my eyes. Tommy took a step towards me and I didn't back away. I put my arms around his neck. I wasn't afraid.

Tommy put his hands around my waist and kissed me tenderly but strongly. There was no longer a wall around him. It was broken the moment our lips touched.


End file.
